The Four Milestones of 2025

This year, although not spectacular, was relatively peaceful for our little family. Lew spent the year on the mend from his knee surgery in late 2024; I spent most of the year trying to balance out my diet and hormone levels; Little Lewie learned about his lung limitations after his collapsed lung in 2024 (two more doctors' appointments confirmed Lewie would need an inhaler and to understand the "weird feelings" from his lung would be his new norm); and my mom, despite her bouts of tiredness, IBS, and neropathy in her feet, would still be relatively active. Thus, we were grateful that our immediate family and the four of us remained healthy this year.

We took trips to Rehoboth Beach, DE; Manchester, VT; and Sleepy Hollow, NY in between work, school, and our everyday routines. However, I cannot discount 2025 as another humdrum year...  In fact, this year, we had four major milestones...

4. I started my Doctor of Education at the University of Kansas (KU)--home of the Jayhawks. So far, I have taken a class in the summer and two in the fall, for a total of 9 credits, earning As in all three. I made a pact not to pressure myself to get As, so I am over the moon to know I still have what it takes to be a good student. The research papers and keeping up with the readings have been difficult, but the work is fun when you enjoy the subject matter! This has been a huge milestone as I never thought earning an Ed.D. would be in the cards for me. I have several more years to go, but at the very least, I learned I have the willpower to do this. I love my professors, my classmates (we meet virtually once a week), and the program!

3. Lewie received his Driver's Permit. In August, Lewie took the written exam at the DMV and passed with flying colors. Since then, he's been practicing on the road with Daddy Lew and me. The furthest he's traveled so far is about an hour and a half, round-trip, to bring me to my favorite restaurant for my birthday. I signed him up for driving lessons at a local driving school. Before his first lesson, I told Lewie the instructor would most likely have him do a few back roads in the country until he was more experienced. Boy, was I wrong! When we picked him up, he had quite the story to tell. "Guess where I was? You know the hospital I went to for my lung surgery? I passed by that, and I passed by the Peabody Museum!"

"Say what?" Daddy Lew and I both asked in astonishment. The driving instructor basically took Lewie to one of the hardest places to drive in Connecticut--downtown New Haven! Between awful drivers, trucks parked on the side of the road, traffic congestion, and one-way streets, Lewie was subjected to the worst of the worst. (Even I avoid driving in this area like the plague!) "Yeah, there were lots of people that swerved around us and even drove through red lights," he exclaimed. I thought that was a challenging route for a new driver who had been on the road only twice before, but in the end, I was grateful he had the experience. I was surprised by my mom's reaction when she heard the news. "That's one great driving instructor!"

For Christmas, Lewie received the whole "driving package." For $899, he will have virtual class sessions and eight hours worth of lessons. The bonus to spending this money, I learned, is that we will get an insurance discount when he officially gets his license. Many of his friends have had their licenses for over a year by now. Some even have their own cars and drive to school. I feel lucky that Lewie hasn't argued with us about getting it sooner.

2. I turned 50, or as Lewie likes to say, half a century old. I wrote about this milestone in a previous post, but I didn't write about my husband's gift. Only a few days after my birthday, I went to see the Broadway musical Hell's Kitchen at the historic Shubert Theater in NYC. My hubby bought the ticket, and my sister-in-law, Missy (with her best friend, Melanie, and daughter, Sarah), took me out for a day of fun! We picked up Sarah at Fordham University and had a delicious late lunch at an Italian restaurant a few blocks away. From there, we took the subway into Manhattan, where we walked through Times Square before ultimately getting to the theater. It was an outstanding performance, and the best part was that all three of us--Missy, Sarah, and I--were celebrating October birthdays. We didn't get home until well after 1 a.m.!

1. Lewie started the college tour.  As a junior in high school, Lewie is quickly approaching college application time! He's confident he wants to major in computer science and engineering with a possible minor in music. (As a higher education professional, I know we cannot place too much weight on majors at this age, but Lewie is fairly confident his future will be in computer science--gaming and computers have been his passion since he was six years old!) 

So far, we have visited three campus Open Houses this fall — at Sacred Heart University (my alma mater), the University of Connecticut (UCONN), and Quinnipiac University (QU) — in that order. To my surprise, UCONN is his first choice so far, though we won't completely discount the others. After all, I remind Lewie all the time that our ultimate decision will likely hinge on scholarships and financial aid packages. 

We still have a few more college visits to go, but I will write about "the college tour" in the spring after we visit the others — unless we decide to visit a few more during the summer. For now, we are looking at colleges within three hours of home. I don't think that will change, but then again, I never thought Lewie would love UCONN as much as he did either. 

Next year, we will be placing a hyperfocus on scholarships. It will be difficult while I'm attending college myself, but I remind myself every day that Lewie's success is most important. I'm not done being a parent yet!!!

On December 2nd, I had a fun surprise. The UCONN Huskies played the KU Jayhawks in the Big 12 Men's Basketball Conference. Of course, the UCONN Huskies were favored to win, and they did, but I showed Lewie the highlights. If he becomes a Husky, we'll essentially be on opposing teams, since my college is the Jayhawks.  We will see what the future brings!

A Sleepy Hollow-een!

For the last several years, Lewie and his friends have gone on Halloween trips. First, it was the Jack-O-Lantern Spectacular at the Roger Williams Zoo in RI, then it was Salem, MA, and this year it was Sleepy Hollow.

Years ago, we took Lewie to Sleepy Hollow, to see The Great Jack O'Lantern Blaze (similar to the Jack-O-Lantern Spectacular) and tour the Sleepy Hollow Cemetery, which included the Old Dutch Church.  I knew this trip might be less exciting than our trip to Salem last year, but my good friend, Sue, and I decided to give it a try. As on past trips, it would be Little Lewie and her son, Ryan, their friend Noah, and Big Lew, Sue, and me. 

Our trip started with a stop at the Captain Lawrence Brewing Company for lunch. Then, we were off to explore downtown Sleepy Hollow.  In short, the trip was okay, but it didn't keep the boys' interest. First, we quickly discovered there were not as many interesting shops as in Salem. Instead, there are more historic things to do — such as tours of the cemetery, the Old Dutch Church, and Philipsburg Manor. Unfortunately, unlike my husband and me, Sue and the boys were uninterested in the tours, explaining that they didn't believe in spending money for information they would soon forget.

We walked around the historic landmarks, but again, without a ghost tour or something to make them entertaining, they didn't spark much interest. In the end, the boys walked back to the car while Sue and I walked around the Old Dutch Church before retreating to the Extended Stay American Suites in Elmsford--a moderately priced, no thrills hotel. (In other words, the hotel was just as blah as the trip.)

The two "events" we were most looking forward to were that night and the next morning. For example, we bought 10 p.m. tickets for the Haunted Hayride. The event is so popular, those were the only tickets I could secure!  The next morning, we would head to the SUP Witches Festival at Kingsland Point Park in Sleepy Hollow, NY — a craft fair and music festival with an interesting twist. Here is the newyorkcity.explore Instagram post:

Hundreds of witches are taking over the Hudson River this weekend! 🌊

Join the SUP Witches Festival as costumed paddlers glide across the river, transforming SUP boards into floating spells, and bringing legendary Halloween vibes to the waterfront. Expect:
✨ A wicked paddle parade
🎶 Live music & DJ sets
🍂 Food trucks & “witchy” treats
🛍️ Vendors, spooky goods & more
🎭 Appearances by the Headless Horseman

Before the hayride, a block party kicked off at 5 p.m. (We arrived around 7:30.) The block party featured all kinds of food, craft vendors, and two music stages--one for a heavy metal cover band and one for a "pop-music" DJ.  Lew and I enjoyed the block party — even dancing to a song or two. The boys walked through it and plopped themselves down on the sidewalk. All I could do was hope they would, at the very least, enjoy the hayride.

Around 9:30ish, we walked to the fire station to find out about our tickets. Should we stand in line now? They suggested we should, but I almost fainted when I saw the line stretch a pure mile down the road. "This is the line?" I asked, hoping I was wrong.  I wasn't. To make matters worse, there was some type of problem during the hayride. (We learned that some local teenagers were causing problems on the trail.) This backed up the event for TWO HOURS!  So, we didn't stand in line for 30 minutes to go on our 10 p.m. hayride. We stood in line for TWO AND A HALF HOURS, getting on the hayride at midnight!!!!

The Haunted Hayride's advertisement reads...

"Climb aboard the Sleepy Hollow Haunted Hayride and hold on to your head! All seems well when you board your hay wagon in the brightly lit streets of downtown Sleepy Hollow. The journey begins innocently enough. Rumbling off into the dark, you realize too late you are heading down the Albany Road past the Old Dutch Church, following exactly Ichabod Crane's flight from the Headless Horseman. Then you're through a set of iron gates, and the wagon slips into the dark woods of the hollow. Clattering across a wooden bridge, you start to hear shrieks and the sound of hoofbeats...[when the Headless Horseman makes his appearance]."

The hayride itself was cool. We rode right through the Sleepy Hollow Cemetery and heard shrieks until we came to nearly a mile of ghoulish, creepy costumed characters and scenes. Before getting to the scary part of the hayride, I enjoyed the trip through the city and up through the cemetery. The sky was super clear, and I pointed out a shooting star (meteor) to Lew and Lewie. We watched for more and saw others...

Unfortunately, the two-and-a-half-hour wait on our feet ruined it for the boys. If the trip had left on time, I think they would have liked it. Instead, they were irritated by the wait and thought the ride was too expensive. They were right; each ticket cost $50! However, none of them had to pay for their own tickets — Sue and I bought them! With the ride lasting nearly an hour, we didn't arrive at the hotel until well after 1 a.m. We were exhausted!

The next morning, we ate breakfast at a diner across the street from the hotel and headed out to the SUP Witches Festival. The location, skirting the Hudson River, was absolutely beautiful, and we arrived right on time to watch 100+ witches "take flight" on their paddleboards. Off to the lighthouse, they went! Unfortunately, from our vantage point, they looked more like black dots on the water, but there are some great pictures of the witches up close online.

Photo by Chris Mantz / Photos on the Fly, Courtesy of Rivertowns SUP & Yoga

We had a beautiful day for the festival, and while I enjoyed checking out the craft vendors the most, it was also cool to "people watch." There were families there for a Sunday afternoon outing and tons of people dressed up as witches. Some dogs were dressed up, too!

After 40+ minutes (maybe less), the boys were bored and wanted to go home. I suggested we take a walk to the lighthouse and back, but I was outnumbered. We walked back to our car, ready for the quick 1-hour-and-15-minute ride home.  

There was much hope for this trip, but it was not a favorite. In the end, it made me leave, wondering if the boys are just getting too old for excursions like this. I hope that's not the case, but with Lew's two friends going to college next year, this will be, more than likely, our last Halloween boys' trip. 

A Christmas by Candlelight

This year, my sister-in-law, Missy, surprised us with tickets to see "A Christmas by Candlelight" at Old Sturbridge Village. I laughed at the serendipity as this was something I wanted to do for a while--in fact, we just had a family trip to Old Sturbridge Village during the summer with my cousins Billy, Vincent, Jamie, and Crystal!

Christmas by Candlelight takes us back in time to a festive 1830s New England village, with glowing lanterns, costumed interpreters and storytellers, Christmas music, and delicious treats (from mulled cider and hot cocoa to maple and gingerbread cookies).

When we first arrived, they gave us a map and an itinerary. For example, in the church, they played festive music on a romantic guitar, harp, and flute; in another building, they hosted a magic show; and still, in another building, they offered miniature train displays. Other structures, such as individual residences or the general store, featured themed storytellers who taught us how to make crafts or handed out homemade, tasty treats. (I enjoyed the baked treats the most--I wondered if they would mind if I kept on visiting the same house over and over again to continue getting those yummy gingerbread cookies. My family wouldn't let me find out. In fact, one thing I learned is that when you're sightseeing with a bunch of teenagers, be prepared to walk quickly. This was not a group interested in quiet, peaceful strolling.)

It was a chilly night, but not nearly as cold as when we would take the kiddos to Santa's Village in New Hampshire. Most of us wore hats, scarves, and gloves with handwarmers tucked inside. My son, who feels perpetually warm, just wore a lined jacket. I was amazed at how warm his hands were without any gloves!

Overall, it was a special holiday outing with all of Lewie's cousins — the kind we used to have when they were younger and still believed in Santa. Nowadays, with Sarah in college and Lewie and Brooklynn in high school, it is hard to align everyone's schedules for a short trip. (We are discovering this with Lewie's friends, who now have jobs after school.) Instead of holding our kiddos' hands, making them wait in line to get a picture with Santa, our kiddos were leading the pack, chatting a mile per minute while we struggled to keep up. There was a line for Santa, but they unanimously decided to skip it. Conversations were no longer about Christmas and wondering what Santa might leave under the tree; instead, they were about internet memes, Netflix shows, or previous or current high school teachers. 

At one point, I fell behind the group, purposely wanting to take in this new era. I remember being a teenager, but my teenage years were so different from this generation, which was so different from the generation before, and the generation before that...  Indeed, we were trying to capture Christmas in the 1830s — a time before the internet, TV, phones, or even modern electricity. I just finished studying the history of higher education in the United States and learned that only two colleges existed in Connecticut at the time—Yale and Trinity—both established to expand their Congregational and Episcopal religious denominations, which were rivals. Residents of Old Sturbridge Village would have been Puritan (Congregational), and slavery would have been outlawed in their region by this time; however, in another 30 years, some residents would join the Union Army to fight the bloodiest and deadliest conflict in U.S. History, the Civil War.

My mind eventually returns to our present. The quieter, humbler Christmas of the 1830s has been replaced by one of haste, materialism, and capitalism. Instead of receiving a homemade wooden toy or an orange in a stocking, our children dream of plastic Lego sets or cell phones. Life is less physically taxing for us (few of us labor on farms or cook over stone hearths), but it is still as mentally taxing, perhaps more so, as we are constantly bombarded by advertisements and opinions across social media, the internet, TV, and everyday life. Yes, each generation has its own traditions and its own problems. Living in the 1830s was simpler but no easier with war looming. 

Today, I look back on our family time from a week ago and am so grateful for the unique experience of this generation. Life evolves, but memories exist, no matter the era.

Happy 50th Birthday to Me!

I turned 50. It was quick, painless, and without too much fanfare. 

Truth is...I've been feeling like I turned 50 two years ago. Changing jobs and starting at several new places had already had me tackling the big questions — what do I want to do with the second chapter of my life? Do I see myself working another 15, 20, or 25 years?

My health prompted me to ask other questions. Did I go through perimenopause or menopause? Why do I often feel tired and forgetful? 

Last year, at age 49, I began seeking answers. My new career with our state community college system solidified that I want to work in higher education for the rest of my life — and, more, that I want to return to school to pursue higher positions (as I had before). I have just completed two fall courses toward my Doctor of Education and, surprisingly, am making it work — with my career, my son, my husband, my mom, and my friends and family.

I also learned that I am in menopause or even post menopause. With low hormone levels, I've been having the following symptoms:

• Hot flashes and night sweats
• Brain fog, difficulty concentrating, and memory problems
• Irritability, anxiety, and depression
• Joint pain, muscle aches, and weight gain, and
• Exhaustion and sleep disturbances

I changed my diet and started taking supplements to counteract these changes, but truthfully, I still experience a combination of these symptoms every day.  One day it might be exhaustion, depression, and brain fog--another day it might be anxiety, muscle aches, and hot flashes. I am continuing on a path to wellness and may write more about it at a future date.

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For my birthday, I had two requests. One was to go out to my favorite restaurant with my peeps — my mom, hubby, and Lewie.  The second was to go on a romantic weekend trip to Manchester, VT, with hubby.  Lucky for me--I got both my wishes!  

Here is our dinner at the GW Restaurant in Washington, CT.

For our trip to Manchester, VT, Lew and I stayed at the Equinox Resort. It was our first trip without Little Lewie since he was born 17 years ago!  I chose the resort because we knew it well — we went on vacation here fifteen years ago, when Lewie was less than two years old.  

It was interesting going to the same place without a toddler. For one, Lew and I had a chance to dine out at several restaurants and explore the town--something we didn't have the luxury of doing with a squirmy little one in tow.  Second, I had a chance to go for both a massage and a yoga hike! The massage was planned, but the yoga hike was completely spontaneous. The resort offered it as a complementary service. Once I learned the details (hiking half an hour uphill to a mountain lake for an hour of yoga before hiking back down), I was all in. The BEST part of the experience is that when I arrived at the meeting point on Monday morning, I learned that I had the yoga instructor all to myself. We clicked immediately, as if we had been best friends for an eternity, and she showed me a few gentle yoga moves I could do at home to unwind.

Hubby greeted me after my yoga hike for a soak in their outdoor hot tub—the view was spectacular — and then we took a dip in the pool. While we were swimming, an 80-something-year-old water aerobics instructor invited us to join her class, and we had the best time ever. At first, my husband, citing his recent knee surgery, tried to get out of it. She laughed: "Welcome to the club! I've had surgery on both knees." She was fun, energetic, and limber. We joined three other ladies (60+) and laughed as we paddled and kicked through the water. Now, at 50, I've begun to realize I have more in common with this group than with my seventeen-year-old son... I admired our aerobics instructor, wishing that if I'm ever lucky enough to be eighty one day, I hope to have her vitality!

Interestingly, when I first entered the pool area (before our water aerobics), I began to sob. Memories of being in there with Little Lewie fifteen years before flashed before my eyes. It was one of his first pool experiences, Daddy Lew and I taking turns pushing him on his float as he giggled and giggled. 

After a full ten minutes, I finally composed myself--I hadn't had a good, long cry like that in ages. Perhaps the businesses of life suppressed it. No matter, it was needed. When we get older, we miss, of course, the youthful days of our childhood and our twenties. This cry wasn't about that. It was a longing for my thirties, the days of being a wife and a mom for the first time. Oh, how I wish I could relive those moments of Lewie's toddlerhood, even for just a day... The pool may have been empty, but my mind saw Daddy Lew, Little Lewie, and me in there splashing away like no time had passed at all...

During our trip, we also had a chance to drive to the Hildene, the Lincoln family home, after President Abraham Lincoln's death. We visited this place before, when Lewie was five, but the experience was different now that there were just the two of us, meandering around the property at our own pace. (I made sure to visit the gift shop before leaving--purchasing Vermont's specialties: yummy chocolate, maple candy, and cheddar cheese curds.)

On the last day, I had a chance to saunter around the Northshire Bookstore, a must-see not only for book-lovers but also for coffee drinkers, bakers, record-enthusiasts, crafters, and home decorators. (I bought a book called Keep Your Brain Alive by Katz and Rubin--the perfect self-gift for a 50-year-old that wants to remain sharp and relevant.)

Our trip lasted only two nights, but I arrived home feeling well-rested to tackle the last two months of the semester. (Well, almost... during my massage, the door to the massage room kept mysteriously opening. "What's going on?" I asked quizically as my masseuse closed it for the second time. "It's probably just the ghosts," she said, half serious, half laughing. "You know this place is haunted.") On my last night at the hotel, I slept with a few lights on... still, it was the perfect trip to welcome in a new decade.