Saying Goodbye to Summer

This summer was a mix of work, vacation, some slow summer days, and more work.  It was the "work" part that made this summer feel less fulfilling.  The College had asked me to take on two administrative roles instead of one, which meant more meetings, more responsibilities, longer hours, and less time for family and friends.  It did mean more pay, but I soon discovered that when given the choice to spend more time at home versus earning more money--I choose home.  I'll always choose home.

I'm still serving in two administrative roles, but it looks as if they will be hiring someone soon for the interim VP position I've been holding.  When that happens, I will probably celebrate in some way... Maybe I can go back to my daily walks and my weekly blogging?  My morning exercises and my nightly reading with Little Lewie?  My biweekly dates with hubby and monthly "spring" cleaning days?  My den leader Cub Scout planning and participation?  Yes, when I get my life back, it will be glorious.  I will get to daydream again, too.

After our vacation to Yellowstone, it was back to work as usual, so we made the most of our weekends.  In July, we went to see fireworks and hosted some pool parties...

A visit with old friends... Here they are dressed after a full day of swimming...
(I'm not sure why Lewie reached for a long sleeve shirt...)

Then, in August, we celebrated some birthdays and fit in some final days with friends...

All summer long, we ate ice cream...

And then we ended our summer days in September with some afternoons on my dad's fishing boat.  (Yes, we did not get the boat out until after Labor Day...)

Finally, we squeezed in a few milestones, too, like our first time water-tubing and our first time paddle-boarding.  

Yes, it has been tough saying goodbye to summer this weekend.  I suppose it's because we won't see the season for another nine months.  Goodbye old friend.  I will think of you often.  Until we meet again. 

My Father's Boat Part II

As mentioned in my last post, my dad's boat, the Rhonda B., waited ten long years to be seaworthy again.  Being left outside during those cold New England winters, it fell into disrepair, and there never seemed to be a "right" time to fix it.  Often there were choices.  Do we fix the hull on the boat, or do we pay for my husband's brakes, tires, radiator hoses, etc.?  Do we pay to fix the boat, or do we use the money to open the pool?  At one time, I even received an offer on the boat.  "I can take it off your hands," a contractor we knew told me.  "Will you take $1,000 for it?"

As tempting as selling the boat was, especially during hard financial times when my husband was seeking inpatient treatment and not working, I held onto it.  I held onto the dream that one day my husband would be well and our lives would be easier.  I held onto the dream that the Rhonda B. would get repaired.  I held onto the dream that one day Little Lewie would be able to ride his grandfather's boat, and he would love it the same way I did so long ago.  This dream, these dreams, stayed close to my heart, and I never let them go...

Then, something miraculous happened.  On October 10, 2018, the Rhonda B., after a long ten years, was launched out onto the water again.  After skipping work and after-school commitments, the three of us "set sail" for a beautiful sunset cruise.  The weather, in the 70's, was mild, and the lake (seeing that it was the middle of the week) was calm and peaceful.  Immediately, all five of my senses came rushing back to me--the smell of the boat; the sound of the motor; the view of the water, trees, and houses; the feel of the warm breeze brushing my cheeks and the gentle rocking of the boat.  I teared up as for that 40 minute trip, I experienced pure, unadulterated joy.  It was heaven on earth.  It was proof that hope, faith, and prayer are real.  It was proof that dreams are real.

Just as expected, Lewie LOVED the boat.  Not only was he disappointed to see the trip end, but he said, "Daddy, the next time we go on the boat, I want to learn how to drive it."

If life happened according to my plans, Lewie would have been on the boat since he was a baby.  However, as much as I romanticize this, I realize that the boat wouldn't have the same kind of meaning or impact that it has today.  Lewie loved the boat.  Why?  Because his very first trip occurred when he was old enough to appreciate it.  Because he saw the boat sit in our driveway for all these years, and now he personally has a connection to it that, at age ten, he will remember.

Life doesn't always follow a linear trajectory; there aren't always calm seas.  We've survived some storms.  Some waves have pushed us back to the start, and then others have left us meandering with no direction at all.  Then we were adrift for a while, waiting to see where the wind might take us next.  Prayer and hope helped us navigate through it. 

Now, in 2018, I think we found the shore.  If so, we'll set sail again next year, and this time, we'll have a lot more confidence.

My Father's Boat - Part I

I've been waiting to write a post about my father's boat for a long time.  You see, the Rhonda B. (possibly named after an old girlfriend) is my dad's small bass boat purchased in 1973.  The boat company/builder Ouachita (pronounced Wash-A-Taw) operated through the 1970s and was declared "out of business" in 1980.  (I found a video of the very same boat in very good condition here, complete with its signature sea-foam green color with an orange stripe at the top.  You've gotta love the 70's!)

The boat was my dad's pride and joy, and just like a best friend, it went with him everywhere.  By day, my dad worked as a distribution plant manager at Warnaco, a company that designed and sold women's underwear, sportswear, and swimwear worldwide.  (The name Warner's still exists, but the company was purchased by PVH, another American clothing company, in 2013).  By evening, my dad was a fisherman, spending his nights and weekends either fishing, repairing the boat, planning boat trips, or going to boat shows.  His passion was fishing, and he told me one day that his biggest regret was not going to college to become a forest ranger.  Truly, my dad loved nature, and I owe my own love of the great outdoors to him.

From the time I was five (maybe even younger), my dad took me out on his boat, and we would spend hours cruising around lakes (he loved fresh water the best), fishing, and sitting outside being ever present of the whistling wind, the birds calling, the occasional splash from a fish below, and the water lapping persistently against the boat.  It was magical.  My teen years toyed with my brain, convincing me that boat trips were trite and boring, but oh do I wish I could get those days back with my dad again!

In June 2007, life as I knew it changed forever.  My dad had passed away in his sleep, and since he was living alone in another state, I had to authorize the police to use forced entry, if necessary, to check on him.  My worst fears were realized.   After calling in to work, my husband and I left for an 18 hour trip to Georgia, so I could take care of everything as his only child and the executor of his estate.

The trip wasn't an easy one, but we decisively agreed that my dad's most important "valuables" were his photographs, a few letters/cards, and of course, the Rhonda B.  We brought those back home with us, and we brought my dad's ashes back home, too.  Connecticut was his true home; he was only forced to move to Georgia in the 90's to keep his job with Warnaco.

A lot happened that year after my dad's death.  We held a funeral, buried most of my dad's ashes in a cemetery with his mom, and then planned for a trip to Belgrade Lakes, Maine where we could release a few more of his ashes in his most favorite place.  One more thing happened; I found out I was pregnant with Little Lewie!  The planned trip to Belgrade Lakes, therefore, would be doubly significant.  It would be a revered time to celebrate my dad's life and legacy as well as a time to celebrate the coming of a new life.  I was eight months pregnant at the time.

Dining at the Belgrade Lakes Inn

Hubby aboard the Rhonda B.

Almost a year after my father's passing, in June 2008, Lew and I took the Rhonda B onto the open waters of Great Pond, the largest lake as part of the Belgrade Lakes region.  It was the lake my dad would visit faithfully to spend his two weeks of vacation every year, and it was the lake where I would get some of my first fishing lessons as a pre-teen and teenager.  (I have pictures somewhere.)  The trip brought back a rush of childhood memories, and yet, here I was now thirty three years-old with my husband of two years and pregnant with our first and only child.  We chose a calm evening to take the boat out, say a a few words, and then release my dad's ashes against the backdrop of a beautiful sunset.  It was the most perfect moment--one that somehow gave me peace, closure, and a reverence for the cycle of life.  It was sad and wonderful at the same time.

Holding onto my dad's few ashes.

When we returned from this most sacred trip, it was full-speed ahead.  Little Lewie was born, my husband became sick (addicted to opiates after being prescribed Oxycodone for his back surgery), and my father's beloved boat, the Rhonda B, fell into disrepair from sitting out in the elements unused.

We entered a decade of uncertainty, and while we still shared many joyous and beautiful moments as a family (especially with Little Lewie), there was a dark shadow looming.  Would my husband be able to fight his addiction?  Would he survive?  Would our marriage survive?  And...at the same time, would my dad's favorite boat ever see water again?  Would Little Lewie ever get to ride on the boat that brought me so many blissful childhood memories?  The boat, waiting patiently in the driveway and in storage for this decade to pass, became a symbol, and my answer would come this year...

A Birthday Celebration - For Me and My Mom

My mom and I like to celebrate our birthdays together since we are only five days apart.  (I was born on the 3rd and my mom was born on the 8th.)  Sometimes we'll go on a bus trip adventure or schedule a day of shopping.  This year, we decided to have Little Lewie join in the festivities, so we booked tickets for the Essex Steam Train and Riverboat Cruise.  Then, as a last minute surprise, I asked my Aunty Kiki if she and her best friend Karen could join us for the trip.  (They live two hours away, but Essex, CT is only an hour from their home, so it was the perfect place to meet up.)

The trip did not disappoint.  Although it was a little chilly (in the 50's and windy), we were perfectly warm enough in the train and in the boat seating area.  (Plus, we were able to buy ourselves tea, hot cocoa and coffee at the boat snack bar to warm ourselves up.)  The scenery was beautiful, and although many of the trees have not changed color yet, we could still see the hint of yellows, oranges, and reds.

The best part of the day, by far, however, was the company.  With our busy schedules, it's hard for all of us to find a day to be just about family.  I'm so glad last weekend, we put aside the laundry, the homework, the grocery shopping, the errands, and just about everything else to make family first.

After the excursion, we went to downtown Essex to eat at the Black Seal Seafood Grille and then we took pictures across the street, not far from the town gazebo.  Downtown Essex is charming, and they do a great job decorating for Halloween.  Scary witches, ghosts, goblins, and even fairies adored their lampposts. Plus, mums, pumpkins, cornstalks, and hay could be seen just about everywhere--especially in front of Essex's cute little shops.  My mom and I stopped in one little clothing boutique before leaving for the day.  (Little Lewie waited quietly, yet a little impatiently.  Shopping is not his thing.)

At it turns out, 41 feels just like 40 and 39 and 38...etc. etc.  This is not a milestone year, yet I plan to make it one.  This year, my goal is to visit one of our beautiful National Parks and take some other memorable trips.  At age 8, Lewie is able to begin appreciating nature's beauty, learning about history and science, and remembering special places.  The travel bug has returned, and this is the year, I will begin planning for a decade's worth of amazing trips (at least before Lewie goes off to college). Watch out the Grand Canyon, Yosemite, Yellowstone, Glacier, Bryce Canyon, and Zion National Park, we're coming...we are COMING.