When Life Gives You Lemons...

 I can't believe I haven't written a blog post in a full month, but then again, I can...

The same day I posted about my wonderful Mother's Day Dinner, my mom tripped on our front porch and fell...HARD.  I witnessed the whole thing.  We were freaking out over these flying ants that were burrowing in the cracks on my porch, and she came running with a can of Raid.  She was in such a hurry to get rid of the infestation that she tripped and fell.  (To this day, I'm not sure if she tripped on the porch step or the garden hose in front of the porch step, but I guess it doesn't matter...)  The fall keeps on playing in my head over and over again, and I'm still kicking myself for not being able to react faster.  If I were only an inch or two closer, I could have stopped it!!

My beautiful mom at the Hildene three years ago in 2018...

What transpired after the fall was a series of X-rays, doctor's appointments, an MRI, and a scheduled surgery.  The first known bruises were on the right side--she had scrapes on her knee and a swollen wrist.  A visit to a medi-clinic confirmed she broke her wrist, but she needed to see a specialist to determine if she needed surgery. My poor mom wanted to avoid surgery at all costs, so she opted to have her wrist heal on its own--first with a hard cast and then with a soft, removable one.  The only disadvantage to not choosing surgery, as she was told, was that her wrist would look different--it would probably have a bump.

After a week of icing and treating her wrist, my mom then started to complain about pains to her back, right hip, and stomach.  We were perplexed. For a whole week, my mom was able to walk with no problem; now she could barely stand up!  We went back to get more X-rays, and this time they found out that she fractured a vertebrae in her back!!  The fall did even more damage than we suspected!

Once again, my mom was faced with a decision about having surgery.  If she chose to let her vertebrae heal on its own, it would mean 12 weeks of being in a body brace and not being able to bend.  It would also mean 12 individual weeks of doctor's visits to confirm her vertebrae was healing correctly.  The other option was a surgery called kyphoplasty.  If she chose this route, the doctor would fill the crack in her vertebrae with a type of cement and release her to go home on the same day:  "Patients experience 50% pain relief almost immediately.  After a full 48 hours, you'll be able to go outside and garden again."     

When faced with the decision of 12 weeks in a body cast vs. an out-patient surgical procedure that could give her her life back within 48 hours, she chose the latter.  Sure there were more doctor's appointments to confirm she was in good enough health--a bone scan, a cardiogram, an MRI, a blood draw, and a visit to her primary care physician--but now, almost a month after her fall, she goes in for surgery TODAY.

My mom's nervous.  I'm nervous.  But, the alternative is watching my mom suffer for another 2 to 3 months while she sits in front of the TV, losing all the strength and movement in her body to atrophy.  

The reality is that sometimes life gives us lemons...  For starters, my mom and I were supposed to have a mother-daughter day on Sunday, May 23rd (the day after my mom's fall) to enjoy a day of shopping at the Clinton Outlets.  On Friday, June 18th, we were supposed to go to the annual Newport Flower Show, which was cancelled last year due to COVID.  And, of course, she was supposed to be able to go outside and enjoy swimming in the pool now that we've had some steamy 90 degree days.

The Newport Flower Show 2019

For me, this past month was hard.  In the midst of this excitement at home, I was scheduled to begin teaching two classes on May 24th all while trying to complete several important reports (due the first week of June) for my administrative position.  Lewie was scheduled to return back to school on June 1st too, so he could spend his last two weeks getting acclimated to middle school while seeing his teachers and classmates in-person!  Naturally something had to go and that was my blog--my time to think, reflect, write, and daydream.

Now the surgery is here, and we're not out of the woods yet.  Will my mom be pain-free?  Will she be able to do all the things she once did?  Will she get full recovery of her right wrist?  Will she finally be able to enjoy summer the way she had imagined?

The lemonade comes from watching everyone in this little family pitch-in.  For the most part, I've been my mom's caretaker.  I make breakfast, lunch, and dinner; I write-out her bills and balance her checkbook; I buy her groceries, vitamins, and supplies; and I send out needed paperwork to help her get short-term disability, etc.  However, my husband has taken her to most of her appointments, and he's made us some yummy dinners, too.  (After my mom came back from one of her more difficult appointments last week, hubby took her home and made her a yummy late breakfast of eggs and bacon; he's treated her like his own mom!)  Now that school is out, Little Lewie has been in the habit of going next door to check on Grammy, too.  Sometimes he pours her water or brings her morning banana; other times, he keeps her company by watching a movie or playing a game.

We may be a small family, but we are mighty.  When one person is down, the whole family is down, and that's why we all need to rally together to become whole again.  I wish this fall never happened...but at least we made lemonade as best we could.